Having trouble getting your life together? Or would you just like some advice on how to live a better life?
If so, then there is a proven plan to take back control and create a better future for yourself.
In his book “Leading the life you want,” Stewart Friedman outlines six distinct life stories that highlight how you might live a more fulfilling, meaningful, and integrated life with others. He believes that brave action is the biggest barrier between words and outcomes.
A psychological drive to achieve a state of complete satisfaction and happiness is what we perceive as getting our life together. We cannot control our lives to be flawless and eliminate all chaos because we are all flawed. Therefore, human beings can never be completely fulfilled. But by making small changes to our conduct and how we go about doing things on a daily basis, we can reduce the chaos in our life.
Happiness is influenced by a variety of factors, and you can’t hope to address them all in a single day or two. Implementing one-by-one control is a good strategy.
We’ll lay down a 15-day schedule for organizing your life in this article.You will find that finding significance and incorporating more happiness into your everyday routine is not difficult if you stick to this approach.
Let’s get started.
- 1 Day 1: Ask yourself: What do I really want? Do I already own a portion of it? What is absent?
- 2 Day 2: Be proactive instead than reactive; stop snoozing your alarm starting today.
- 3 Day 3: Start engaging in conversations with your fellow passengers from today
- 4 Day 4: Start by addressing the most crucial duty.
- 5 Day 5: Quit overthinking life.
- 6 Day 6: Get moving and partake in healthy activities
- 7 Day 7: You and your partner should follow the “ten-minute rule.”
- 8 Day 8: Switch up your daily tasks
- 9 Day 9: Begin monitoring your wealth
- 10 Day 10: Make prudent spending
- 11 Day 11: Arrange a networking gathering with a person you find inspiring.
- 12 Day 12: Start writing down three blessings you’re grateful for
- 13 Day 13: Begin to be sincere with yourself
- 14 Day 14: Chat with others, but refrain from moaning all the time!
- 15 Day 15: Eliminate pessimistic people
Day 1: Ask yourself: What do I really want? Do I already own a portion of it? What is absent?
The majority of people in today’s world are unwittingly caught in what is known as the “ambition trap.” This alludes, in the words of New York psychotherapist Katherine Schafler, to the idea that aiming for everything will ultimately lead to unhappiness.
We frequently lose sight of our fundamental desires in the never-ending rat race and blindly follow the road that everyone else is taking. We consequently wind up with a very dysfunctional life.
Actually, it will be simpler to distinguish between what you enjoy doing and what you really want to achieve if you are more conscious of your goals. But since we’re greedy by nature, we want more of everything that we believe will make us happy—more food, money, pleasure, attention, and so forth.
Have we ever considered the connection between this inclination and our ultimate goals? Our level of enjoyment is really determined by our long-term accomplishments rather than these temporary advantages.
Start by posing the above questions to yourself.
Next, make a list of your short-, medium-, and long-term objectives. Knowing exactly what you want out of life will make the process easier.
Your final destination would be stated in your long-term aims.
You can keep track of your progress and make sense of short-term goal clusters by setting medium-term goals. Your short-term goals are the actions you do to advance in your life and work.
On the first day, start working toward your final goals by writing down the answers. Naturally, you are free to alter them whenever you’d like, but the important thing is to remember them!
Day 2: Be proactive instead than reactive; stop snoozing your alarm starting today.
The profound need to sleep that you experience in the morning won’t be satisfied by five more minutes of sleep, and you’ll probably experience the same sensation when you wake up later. Some people also think that getting a little more sleep could help you wake up, but in reality, the opposite is true.
Your endocrine system begins releasing alertness hormones the moment you wake up for the first time, helping your body get ready for the day. However, if you press the snooze button and go back to sleep, this process will take longer. Thus, getting out of bed early has an impact on your productivity and keeps you relatively more alert.
Not to mention, one of the largest obstacles to solving our lifetime issues is our inclination to put things off till later when we can do them today. The main problem with procrastination is that it accumulates significant duties until we are left with an overwhelming amount of unfinished business. And then we experience tension and fatigue, which further impairs our capacity to deal with them and prompts the assignment of new ones.
It seems like everything in life has crumbled at that point. It is preferable that you take the initiative to get out of such a situation. Perform your duties and attend to your obligations as they come up. Avoid waiting till the very last minute. Take tackle each task head-on and maintain control over everything. One of the best ways to take charge of your life and advance is to plan ahead.
Day 3: Start engaging in conversations with your fellow passengers from today
This one sounds a little aggressive, but it’s actually quite helpful. In 2014, a study published in the Journal of Experimental Psychology found that when people have vibrant interactions with other passengers during their commute, they feel happy and are able to accomplish more during and after their trip.
While travelling, a lot of people avoid striking up a discussion with other commuters. This can be the result of shyness or a fear of criticism. Although there is a risk that this will occur, most people would much rather talk to someone to pass the time. However, their motivation for starting the conversation is different from yours.
If you could overcome the fear preventing you from moving forward, you would be truly doing others and yourself a great service. To bring everything together, start conversing with the passengers!
Day 4: Start by addressing the most crucial duty.
Stress is frequently caused by high-priority duties, which leads to the perception that life is difficult. Get to the most crucial duty first thing in the morning rather than wasting time. If being healthy is your top goal, get moving as soon as you wake up and start your regular exercise regimen.
If your focus is on learning a new language, practising the language for the first thirty minutes can help you understand the jargon better because your mind won’t be distracted by anything else.
When it comes to work, start each day with the most important tasks. Author and productivity and time management specialist Laura Vandercam advises that you pick one high-priority assignment and plan to focus on it as soon as you get to the office each day.
This enables you to give those initiatives your all because you are energized within the first hour. On the other hand, if you don’t have something scheduled for the first hour of work, you’ll end up spending it lost in your email and dealing with less important or urgent matters.
Vandercam suggests taking this tactic a step further by using it on Monday mornings when you’re feeling particularly uninspired and overwhelmed with emails. Naturally, you don’t want to miss the boss’s remarks, but you also shouldn’t squander your energy on pointless activities or do nothing for the first sixty minutes.
Day 5: Quit overthinking life.
One of the main challenges you have while trying to make changes in your life is overthinking. You’ll always be caught in the same cycle of issues if you keep reflecting on how unfair life has been to you. Consequently, overthinkers are unable to achieve satisfaction in their life.
The more time and effort you expend on overanalyzing, the worse things get. Your capacity to come up with original solutions to issues wanes. More than anything, dwelling on the unpleasant past—which you are powerless to alter—is a waste of time. In addition to making matters worse, it fosters and intensifies negative emotions like rage, uncertainty, confusion, jealousy, and resentment. Instead of overanalyzing the issues, you may have used the energy to take action and solve them.
So, put down your own “get out of jail free” card and kick the overthinking habit. Plan your time and use your brain to concentrate on the things that are worthy of your attention. In conclusion, instead of thinking about problems you can’t change, start taking recovery steps or think of completely different activities.
Day 6: Get moving and partake in healthy activities
Indeed, maintaining your health is essential to getting everything in order. Sports and fitness activities are great ways to boost your self-esteem. You would feel so much better about yourself when you worked out. Your strength, endurance, and physical fitness would all significantly improve, which would boost your self-esteem.
Endorphins are feel-good hormones released during exercise that reduce pain and promote happiness. Exercise that requires more physical exertion releases more endorphins, which in turn makes you happier.
Your choice to engage in physical activity counts, even if it doesn’t really matter what kind of exercise you choose or how long your sessions are. Choose any activity you enjoy doing. It could be working out, yoga, surfing, skiing, or swimming. So that it’s simple to perform on a frequent basis, attempt to fit it into your everyday schedule.
Day 7: You and your partner should follow the “ten-minute rule.”
Your level of happiness is greatly influenced by your life partner, and vice versa. He or she is a wonderful source of contentment and relief. In her book “Five Simple Steps to take your marriage from good to great,” sociology professor and relationship guru Terri Orbuch recommends the “10-minute rule,” which calls for setting aside 10 minutes each day to spend alone talking about anything other than work, housekeeping, and kids.
After researching the happiest couples in the world, the professor developed this rule. She realized that the majority of contented life partners conversed frequently and shared knowledge with one another outside of the bedroom.
In addition, you can talk to your spouse about the issues and seek for support as a way to decompress from work-related stress. Believe us, even if your spouse doesn’t propose the best course of action, it will still keep you happy, relieve stress, and free up your mind. Your life would finally seem to be getting better, you’d say.
Day 8: Switch up your daily tasks
Being in a committed relationship, having children, and doing chores all come with a lot of emotional stress. If you and your partner split the labor evenly according to your preferences, you can greatly reduce this mental burden.
On a Sunday, set aside around fifteen minutes for this task. You should each list the duties you are now handling on an individual basis. Next, each person discusses which of those duties they appreciate and which ones don’t.
You may be shocked to learn that your significant other enjoys performing some household tasks that you find objectionable. Therefore, take on the tiresome task of mopping the lounge if you feel more at ease dropping your child off at school or the dentist.
That will make you happier.
Day 9: Begin monitoring your wealth
Keeping one’s life together and having enough money go hand in hand.Begin monitoring your net worth. To put it another way, subtract all of your debt from all of your assets.
In order to best assist her clients, Lauran Lyons Cole, director of personal finance at Business Insider, says she starts by asking them to give her a complete picture of their financial status.
Once you are aware of your current situation, you can continue preparing based on the available data. When you are suffering financial difficulties, being proactive with your financial organization helps to eliminate any potential problems.
But keep in mind that if you continue to assess your value on a daily basis, things may seem more distant because you will observe a lackluster pace of development. Therefore, to notice encouraging development, make sure to select appropriate gaps in your tracking.
Day 10: Make prudent spending
Do you believe that life would be better with more money?It’s not like that in reality.
To be honest, your level of happiness is determined by the way you spend your money.
A monthly salary of $2,000 can make someone happy if they spend prudently and sensibly, but some people find it difficult to live on $10,000 simply because they lack the essential self-control over their spending.
Apparently, the proverb holds true.Money cannot purchase happiness, according to research on positive psychology.So, budgeting is the best course of action.
Thanks to the development of artificial intelligence and the internet of things, businesses can now program emails to be sent automatically based on detailed consumer profiles. People are now tempted to actually add the things to their carts and finish their purchases because these emails are so realistic.
Setting up email filters helped Business Insider deputy editor Libby Kane gain a tight grasp over internet buying. This way, rather than ending up in the inbox, all of her shopping emails are sorted into a distinct shopping folder. When she truly needs to make a purchase, she now clicks on the folder and checks her emails.
Investing more money in experiences rather than material goods is a fantastic idea.
Purchasing a large estate or a fancy car will not make you happy for very long. However, spending money on experiences like traveling, attending concerts, eating out, etc. will make you happy since you will continue to share those experiences with others.
Day 11: Arrange a networking gathering with a person you find inspiring.
In Abraham Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, it is frequently the experiences of other accomplished people that motivate us to adopt new perspectives and advance to the self-actualization level. Do not be reluctant to reach out and arrange a meeting with the person you admire, even if there is a slim probability of success. According to GrowthLab CEO Ramit Sethi, getting a meeting with your target requires responding to your initial email.
He outlines several crucial elements to include in the template, like how you found out about him/her, why you would like to meet, showing respect, and scheduling a time that works for both of you. That could end up being the most transformative fifteen minutes of your life if you make the breakthrough.
Day 12: Start writing down three blessings you’re grateful for
Individuals who obsess about their problems or what they lack frequently stay depressed. They hardly ever recall their happy and successful experiences, or the priceless possessions that many others lack.
Prior to going to bed every night, make it a practice to list your three most precious possessions or three happy events, regardless of what’s going on in your life. One of the best ways to end the day on a positive note is to reflect on your blessings or anything nice.
Facebook’s chief operating officer, Sheryl Sandberg, claims that she has been utilizing this coping mechanism to deal with her husband’s passing and that the practice has literally transformed her life. She continued to reflect each night on the happy times in her life, and eventually she overcame the difficulty.
Moreover, participants in an experiment led by positive psychology movement pioneer Martin Seligman reported feeling happier and less depressed than non-participants.
Day 13: Begin to be sincere with yourself
We have a tendency to place the blame for everything that goes wrong on other people or circumstances. We further lose control of the situation when we continue with this behavior. You cannot make positive changes in your life if you refuse to accept accountability for your own actions. This is because you will never own up to your mistakes.
Admit your shortcomings and begin to be honest with yourself.
Thus, practice self-reflection and accept accountability for issues that affect you personally. If you’ve been bothered by someone’s suggestion, own up to your mistake because you were the one who accepted it. Things will start getting under control as soon as you begin to consider what you could have done better, and everything will appear to be in order at some point.
Day 14: Chat with others, but refrain from moaning all the time!
Making the same complaints about the same issue over and over again does nothing. While sharing your difficulties shouldn’t be discouraged, consider whether doing so will be beneficial. Are you trying to find answers? Are you only attempting to let go of the tension brought on by the issue? Or are you merely discussing them to pass the time?
According to psychology, rumination happens when a person keeps thinking back on bad things that have happened in his life, which makes him dig himself further into the issues. It just helps to increase tension and aggravate anxiety and sadness.
Also keep in mind that everyone is dealing with their own issues. Be there to assist them when they need it if you want them to assist you with your issues. If not, they would just vanish, which would not be enjoyable for you.
Day 15: Eliminate pessimistic people
Give this one your whole attention. Your beliefs and self-perception are greatly influenced by the people around you.
It is difficult to keep your cool and remain goal-focused when you are around jaded, cynical folks.
You can’t advance if people consistently minimize or discourage you. Get rid of the negative people who make you feel bad about yourself and bring out the worst in you. Instead, try to surround yourself with positive people who value and care about you.
It does not, however, imply that you sever contact with others who hold different opinions. The poisonous person who truly wants to damage your wellbeing should be avoided. Being polite and compassionate is admirable, but you need set boundaries in your relationships to keep certain people from ruining your happiness and life.
Furthermore, it is not a strict guideline to constantly take other people’s opinions into account when making decisions. When things don’t seem to be going your way, you have to start prioritizing yourself. Spend less time on topics you are enthusiastic about and learn when to say no to others.